LAUGH LINES

Just Clowning Around: “Tom Selleck has made his Broadway debut in a revival of the play ‘A Thousand Clowns.’ ... It’s the story of a 12-year-old boy who goes to live with his uncle, and not--as the title implies--a documentary about George Bush’s presidential advisors.” (Ira Lawson)

Lights, Camera, Action: “ABC airs a new reality show this fall called ‘Single Girls.’ ... Cameras will follow five young women as they get make-overs and search New York City for Mr. Right. Somehow, you know that Bill Clinton would end up as a game-show prize.” (Argus Hamilton)

A Screwed-Up Order: “It seems that a couple in North Carolina recently were expecting their furniture delivered....Instead, [this couple] got hundreds of pounds of marijuana....You thought they’re surprised....How about the [drug] dealer who ended up with two night stands and an ottoman?” (Jay Leno)

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