Corpulent Cops Want Crown Vics, Not Chevys

Chevy Cavaliers are fine for housewives, but they’re too small for the corpulent police officers of Ciudad Juarez, the Mexican border city’s police chief said.

Armando Castaneda said he wants roomy Ford Crown Victorias, not the 160 Cavaliers the city ordered. “These patrol cars appear better designed for housewives, not police, who spend eight hours” a day in them, he said. “The officers are very ample and very tall and don’t fit comfortably inside.”

“They might as well have gotten us Volkswagen Beetles with sunroofs,” police spokesman Ramon Valdez said. “Then at least we could have our heads sticking out of the top.”