Some School Advice for Parents

A new school year just began. In an effort to promote harmonious parent-teacher relationships, I would like to suggest that parents follow these guidelines.

* Don’t interrupt the teacher while she’s teaching.

This sounds obvious, but you’d be amazed at the number of parents who treat our campus like it’s the Third Street Promenade. Some want to talk, some want to complain, some want bulletins they’ve heard about but have never seen, some drop off sushi. One mom stood in a classroom doorway until her kid came and kissed her.

* Don’t ask the teacher to change your child’s grade.

“It’ll help my child’s self-esteem,” say the parents who’ve made this request in years past. No, it won’t. Self-esteem rises when a student works hard and, as a result, enjoys academic success. Self-esteem rises when a student succeeds in a competitive environment. Parents pressuring a teacher to change a grade to something undeserved do nothing for a child except tell him or her that the system is corrupt and easily manipulated.

* Don’t tell the teacher how well your child did last year.

We’re glad your child did well last year. But it’s irrelevant.

* Don’t tell the teacher that your child couldn’t do his/her homework because of basketball, baseball, soccer, swimming, golf, drama, dancing, karate, shopping, skateboarding, yoga, surfing, cooking, painting, bathing or movie-going.

It’s time for you and your child to rearrange your priorities.

* Don’t come into the classroom weeping after the teacher sends home the guidelines for the research paper.

Last year, a mom staggered into a class waving the sheet of requirements and spluttering, “I can’t do all this work.”

She shouldn’t have to. Let your child have his/her own school experience.

* Don’t let a week go by without looking in your child’s backpack.

If you want to know what’s going on in your child’s life, this is the place to start.

* If a teacher tells you that your child is having problems or is a problem, don’t call the teacher insensitive, unfair or racist. Instead, ask the teacher what you and your child can do to ameliorate the problem. It’s important for the child to see that parents and teachers are working together.

* Don’t tell the teacher how gifted your child is.

If a kid is gifted, the teacher will figure it out soon enough.