These Guys Were Ready to Graduate

Pat Williams, president and general manager of the Orlando Magic, says that Jerry Tarkanian, the new San Antonio coach, is in for a “rude awakening” in adjusting from college to the NBA.

Williams should do his homework.

As an example, three Laker coaches successfully made the move from college to pro head coaches in their first seasons.

Fred Schaus (West Virginia) got the Lakers into the playoffs in 1961 and then won four Western Division championships.

Bill van Breda Kolff (Princeton) coached the Lakers to division titles in 1968 and 1969, losing to Boston in six and seven games in the championship series.

Joe Mullaney (Providence) succeeded Van Breda Kolff in 1970, and the Lakers extended the New York Knicks to seven games before losing in the championship series.

Trivia time: Can you identify the oldest existing men’s track and field individual world record?

Remembering Red: A press release from the UCLA College of Letters and Science quoted Vince Lombardi as saying, “Winning isn’t everything--it’s the only thing.”

If he did, he would have been mimicking Red Sanders, who was first credited with that statement many years before Lombardi.

By the way, Sanders was UCLA’s football coach from 1949 through 1957.

Doesn’t suit him: The Philadelphia Phillies have new uniforms, a style reminiscent of the 1950s and ‘60s--vivid white with thin red pinstripes.

Outfielder Wes Chamberlain said the colors are fine, adding, “But the uniforms don’t fit guys like me--guys with a butt.”

Defensive stance: After scoring 44 points against the Cleveland Cavaliers, 6-foot-6 Michael Jordan said: “With the size difference, I could have gone for 70, or 80.”

Cleveland’s Steve Kerr, a 6-footer, disagreed, saying: “I take that as a personal insult. I know I could hold him to 65 on any given night.”

Knick poisoning: Last week, Boston’s Kevin McHale said the only way the Celtics could catch the New York Knicks in the NBA Eastern Conference race is if the Knicks got botulism.

Well, the Knicks must be feeling sick to their stomachs at the very least, because the teams tied in the standings with 51-31 records and the Celtics won the conference title by beating the Knicks in three of five games during the regular season.

Dead event?Veteran sprinter Evelyn Ashford told the Mazda Track Club news letter, Inside Track, that the women’s 100 meters is no longer an appealing event.

“The 100 is basically dead,” she said. “If you run a 10.7, nobody cares because it’s not a 10.4. Florence’s (Griffith Joyner) record (10.49) won’t be broken for a lot of years--if ever.”

That’s a long time.

Team player: Bob Uecker, a former major league catcher turned broadcaster, once told Johnny Carson on “The Tonight Show”:

“I made a major contribution to the (St. Louis) Cardinals’ pennant drive in 1964--I came down with hepatitis.

Carson: “How did you catch it?”

Uecker: “The trainer injected me with it.”

Trivia answer: Italian Pietro Mennea’s 200-meter record of 19.72 seconds set at Mexico City on Sept. 12, 1979.

Quotebook: Baltimore Manager John Oates on the spacious new clubhouse at Oriole Park at Camden Yards: “I tried to call one of my coaches, and they told me I had to dial a ‘1’ first.”